I was holding out hope for just that one thing to go right; it didn't, my own fault of course, but there you go, it still doesn't make things any better.
Once again I feel guilty and can't apologise, mainly because it's not my fault (but someone has to feel guilty because she certainly won't). Once again I feel lonely beyond belief and have nobody to go to. The only difference this time is that it is also half two in the morning and I can't sleep.
And the hardest word is "Whatever." because it symbolises a decision to turn off all emotions. I haven't, yet, because I'm too tired to. But tomorrow, off they go. Again.
And, okay, something just fell over behind me. There is nobody in the computer room but me.
So I'm also now scared.