There are two people currently in my life who are capable of showing me absolute perfect beauty in the world, and I'm so much in danger of falling for them both.
I really, really, really, really, really don't need that.
They both love other people and they're both sweet enough that they'll be all sympathetic when/if I tell them how I feel about them and that will just hurt more. Blast. I really don't need this. I wish I couldn't feel.
I wish one of them didn't make the world sparkle like this. I wish the other didn't give the world that veil of dark beauty that they should really keep for themselves.
Even on a day like today, when I'm feeling the way I am, and there seems to be no way out...
I'd imagine they don't need this, either.
Oh, and further proof that I'm odd : When I know that someone knows how much it would mean to me that they do something, and then they do it, it means nothing any more because they're only doing it to make me happy, and not because they want to.
Oy.
E.
x