May 8th, 2003

(I've tried patience)


I am a scared kitten this morning.

I've had a really, really, almost unbelievably lovely time with dennyd though. ~happysigh~

But I am scared. I am scared. Convincing myself that I'm the least interesting, least attractive person on the planet, that this afternoon is going to be full of silence full of excuses. And below it all, because I am me, the thought 'Well, at least I should finally get to hear Future Sound Of London'.

It's all a game. Snakes and ladders. I like snakes. But I'm scared of heights.

  • Current Music
    'Fashion', David Bowie.
(I've tried patience)

"I guess you're just what I needed..."

("...I needed someone to bleed" happens to be the next line, but anyway.)

Gods, what an absolutely wonderful day.
I've kept trying to explain to my mum how good my day was, and have just ended up smiling at her lots and hugging myself. I am very happy.
Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday morning I was really stressed, horribly tense, headachy, tearful, nervy, exhausted. By Wednesday evening I was happy and in the arms of dennyd, which not only can't be bad, but is very very lovely indeed. 'Tis not a bad way to wake up either. ~smile~
And then, trains, briefly worrying about times and things but I had nothing to worry about, really.

I can remember exactly the last time I was so worried about meeting up with someone and had such a good and not-worrying time. I can remember it very well. This was lots and lots fluffier, though. ~g~
More people in the world should make little sounds of contentment, incidentally.
Then again, if more people did it, I wouldn't find it so special.
~purrrrrrrrrrrrrrr~ Reassured. Safe. Safe. Cuddled. Happy. And a little sleepy, now, because mum and I went out to see 'My Fair Lady' tonight.

"I'm a good girl, I am." ~grin~ (You have to have been there, really.)

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Goodnight my loves. All of you.

  • Current Music
    Something very silly I have to sing with my mum soonish.