November 1st, 2002

(I've tried patience)

~tiredkitten~ (Yes, I know I sound drunk in this post, but I don't drink, remember?)

Things hurt a lot more than they should.
I miss people a lot more than I should.
This country likes Westlife a lot more than it should.

Was trying to explain to asrana the different ways in which I talk to my friends; the ones I'm comfortable being 'strange' at and the ones who just get my normal levels of oddness. There are very few I can be 'strange' at...much as you all may think I've been very strange at you, but, well, you ain't seen nothin' yet, and the chances are you never will, unless you have already. ~g~
So few people I want to see that side of me. I'm sorry if you're one of them. Because it would mean that you'd have to deal with this sort of thing on a regular basis :
I didn't realise you would be one of them. But the secret's in your writing; to me it's like watching a cracking crystal, seeming flawless and only reflecting your room, then a fine line appears, the crystal that you write splits a little and suddenly you're reflecting the inside of yourself, almost by accident. And it's full of more, tiny, thin, spreading cracks, so thin, but reflected upon themselves a thousand times.
BeautifulfascinatingandIwanttotouchthecracks...andslideinside...and...


~waves hands~ Just sometimes it's so...unexpected. And. Reading back, it's just plain weird.
I've made too many mistakes of this nature recently. Why do I keep seeing angstful wildcats as sweet fluffy kittens? Must remind self : I know *no* sweet fluffy kittens. I know *one* relationship which is perfect in all but one way, and no others. I know *nobody* who does not have problems of some kind.
Please remember I love all my friends so deeply that none of them believe it. Please don't think it's just you. Please don't think there's anything special in the way I feel for you. Because if you did then you might run away and I wouldn't want that. I want to keep you here, close by. But if you want to run then I won't stop you, because I love you.
Like I love all my friends.

Anyway. Time to sleep find more music...

E.
x
  • Current Music
    'Kiss', London After Midnight.
I can fly!

"........"

Gods, I really don't want to be awake. I feel like the fairies spent the night sandpapering the back of my throat. Ow.

Anyway. The long silence in the subject. Well...
~raises hand~ My bad. I tripped over my own abilities again. D'oh.

I have *got* to stop being overconfident about people. ~kicks self~ Just because I understand most of them really doesn't mean there aren't going to be people who surprise me.
It's obvious, I know, but it's all a bit wood/trees for me at the moment.

Anyway. My bad. Stupid me. ~kicks self~

E.
x
  • Current Music
    'Closer', Nine Inch Nails.
I can fly!

(no subject)

My god, someone with a brain, at last!
Normally it takes people weeks and weeks before the other shoe drops from the sky and knocks them out...~g~

~bounce~ Yay for intelligent people! It makes my job so much easier!

Also, I may have found future work, which would be good.

E.
x
  • Current Music
    Bargain Hunt on TV.
I can fly!

(no subject)

~bounce~

Later : Sorry, that wasn't quite emphatic enough.

~bounce~ ~bounce~ ~bounce~ ~bounce~ ~bounce~
I will not fill your whole screen with bounces as all you really need to know is that there are bounces and they seem to be increasing in bounceness.

Bounce. ~nod~

E.
x
  • Current Music
    The same.