DurAnorak (duranorak) wrote,
DurAnorak
duranorak

Hey, kids.

I haven't posted in heinously long because I just haven't known what on earth to say. I've become convinced that nobody I don't talk to on a regular basis could possibly care about what is happening in my life or inside my head (I don't require cries of protest or anything - I genuinely can't imagine why anything I'd have to say would be interesting at this point); either it's mundane, because I am still working two days a week, still enjoying it, still unhappy, still trying to analyse my way out of being unhappy, still living in the same place, and so forth, or it's seventeen-year-old, because I am still unhappy and most of the rest of what goes on in my head has been remarkably horrible in the last few weeks.

I am afraid to say anything in case I upset anyone; I am afraid to say anything in case it invites ridicule; I am afraid to say anything in case it is viewed as tiresome rehashing of the past; I am afraid to say anything in case it makes someone angry with me; I am afraid to say anything in case nobody cares. I am afraid not to say anything in case everyone forgets who I am. Everything about this is deeply frustrating.

There's been a couple of vast discussions about feminism and gender-based discrimination on my Flist (I am still reading most things) that I feel I really ought to say something about, but see reasons 1-5 above why I can't bring myself to. I don't know what I'm supposed to talk about any more.

Help would be welcome. Goodness knows of what kind.

E.
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  • (no subject)

    So I was just thinking, ugh, I'm too crazy to post another song, why would I even bother anyway, when I was suddenly reminded of a track I had on Now…

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    You know when everyone is going crazy about a book, or a film, or a band, and you just get sick to death of even seeing it mentioned, even by people…

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