¢ Mary-Sues who help get the characters together. I don't so much mind the other kind.
¢ Ideas like "...but it wasn't so much the touch itself, as the fact that it was Sirius touching him."
¢ SONGFICS. Gah.
¢ The word "moist". "Wet" works just as well and is so much sexier.
¢ Fanfic pretending to have angst and plot just so the characters can have make-up sex.
And also, I would like to add in *extreme* annoyance that the next time I see the word "musky" in fanfic I am going to break the computer screen. What annoys me the *most* is that I know I'm going to see it again because it's in nineteen fanfics out of twenty. It's REALLY ANNOYING ME.